Friday, April 16, 2010

Well, that was 4K Well Spent

How are your new hearing aids working out, Mom?

Whaaat?

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Batter up!


Chinese food night at the old homestead...

Would anybody like some soy sauce?
"Does anybody like the White Sox????"

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Can you say "sphygmomanometer" three times fast?

"I wonder why my blood pressure has been so high..."

Maybe it's because you're anxious.

"Because I'm ancient?"


Saturday, February 27, 2010

And Zen She Said...




There's an Episcopal Deacon friend on Facebook who's status says he's having lunch at Hooters.

"He wants to be a Buddha?"

* * *

Conversation with grandson:

"Matt, I want you to know how much I appreciate all the work you did at my place."

Oh, that was mostly Sean.

"Leslie Shaw?"

Thursday, February 25, 2010

The lights are on, but...


So, Mom, which lamps do you want to take to your new place?

"Well... I want to take THAT one. It was my grandmother's."

Which grandmother?

"Donahue."

And where did it come from? (Ireland? Wedding present? etc.)

"Well... it was in her HOUSE!"

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Tick Tock...



8:00 p.m. Tuesday
"I better set my alarm.
Why?
"Well, Susan is coming tomorrow morning at eight."
I thought you said she was coming Thursday.
"Oh. Did I?"
Yes.
"Oh. Okay."



8:00 a.m. Wednesday
Mom, you're up early.
"Well, Susan is coming this morning."
That's tomorrow morning.
"Shit."

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

"They were careless people, Tom and Daisy..."


"I have lots of books by John Phillips Marquand!"

Um... what does that have to do with anything?

"Well, you were talking about The Great Gatsby."

Ah... that would be F. Scott Fitzgerald.